Turn Feedback into Your Leadership Superpower
Let’s be honest: just hearing the word feedback can make even the most seasoned leaders uneasy. Whether you’re giving it or receiving it, feedback often becomes awkward moments—tense meetings, misunderstood intentions, or uncomfortable silences.
But within those awkward moments lies real power. Handled well, feedback becomes a catalyst for leadership transformation. Like any superpower, it takes awareness and practice to manage—but once you do, it becomes your edge as a leader.
So how do you take something that feels like a confrontation and turn it into a conversation that inspires growth?
Executive coaching.
In this article, you’ll learn:
• Why feedback feels so uncomfortable (and how to move past that)
• How self-awareness, curiosity, and emotional intelligence change your feedback game
• How coaching equips you to turn awkward moments into learning opportunities
• Practical techniques for giving and receiving feedback that inspires—not intimidates
Let’s dive in and start shifting your mindset—because feedback doesn’t have to feel like torture.
Why Feedback Feels So Hard (and What’s Really Going On)
Even though we know feedback helps us grow, we still resist it. Why?
It’s not just about the message—it’s about how it makes us feel.
When we receive feedback, it can feel like judgment—activating defensiveness, self-doubt, or shame.
When we give it, we worry about coming across as harsh, being misunderstood, or damaging relationships.
According to research from Harvard Business Review, only 21% of employees strongly agree that their performance is managed in a way that motivates them to do outstanding work (Gallup, 2019). How does the other 79% feel?
“When we meet feedback with curiosity instead of fear, we open the door to new possibilities, deeper self-awareness, and better leadership.”
Marielena Sabatier
What are the most Common Feedback Barriers?
• Fear of Conflict or Discomfort- Many don’t want to “rock the boat” or create tension.
• Fear of Criticism – We associate feedback with failure, not learning
• Emotional Triggers – Our ego gets in the way, even when feedback is helpful
• Vague Delivery – Poorly worded feedback causes confusion, not clarity
• Lack of Trust – Without trust, even well-intentioned feedback may be received with skepticism or resistance.
The result? Avoidance, defensiveness, and missed opportunities for improvement. And yes—plenty of awkward moments.
But those moments? They’re where growth begins. Executive coaching helps transform them into clarity, confidence, and connection.
From Awkward to Empowering: The Power of Self-Awareness
At the heart of growth-oriented feedback lies a simple but powerful truth:
You can’t grow if you don’t know how your behavior comes across.
Executive Coaching Helps You:
• Develop self awareness – Connect your behavior to its impact on others
• Build Confidence – To navigate difficult conversations
• Become aware of your internal reactions – Listen curiously without defensiveness
• Reframe Feedback – Move from “I’m not good enough” to “Here’s where I can grow”
“Feedback is just another person’s perspective—listening to it helps us understand ourselves more deeply.”
A 2020 study in the Journal of Organizational Behavior found that leaders with higher self-awareness were significantly more effective in performance reviews and in driving team engagement.
Curiosity: Your Secret to Receiving Feedback Well
If self-awareness is the foundation of growth, curiosity is the doorway through which growth enters.
When we experience awkward feedback moments, our instinct is often to protect ourselves. But choosing curiosity over reactivity shifts us from defense to discovery.
Why Curiosity Transforms Feedback
• It reframes the conversation from judgment to exploration
• It helps regulate emotional responses and stay present
• It opens space for meaningful dialogue and insight
• It signals to others that you’re open, thoughtful, and growth-minded
A Harvard Business Review study found that curiosity boosts information retention, reduces decision-making errors, and increases team collaboration—making it essential in feedback-rich environments.
Curiosity in Action—What It Sounds Like:
• “That’s helpful—can you walk me through an example?”
• “I hadn’t considered that perspective. How did it land with others?”
• “What would improvement look like from your point of view?”
Feedback —it’s an exploration of your impact. And curiosity is your guide.
The Executive Coaching Advantage: Turning Feedback Into a Leadership Superpower
Executive coaching equips leaders with the mindset, tools, and confidence to turn feedback from something awkward into something transformational.
Whether you’re giving feedback or receiving it, coaching helps you navigate these conversations with clarity, purpose, and presence.
1. Developing Emotional Intelligence and Resilience
Feedback often stirs emotion—and coaching helps you manage it before it gets in the way.
• Recognize emotional triggers before they derail your message or reaction
• Learn to stay grounded and respond, not react
• Deliver feedback with clarity, compassion, and intention
A meta-analysis published in the Leadership & Organization Development Journal found that leaders with high emotional intelligence are twice as likely to be rated as effective by their teams.
2. Building Confidence in Crucial Conversations
Coaching helps you move beyond hesitation and into meaningful, productive dialogue.
• Use language that is clear, direct, and respectful
• Frame feedback in a way that invites openness—not defensiveness
• Practice real scenarios until tough conversations feel more natural
3. Using Structured, Constructive Feedback Tools
Vague feedback creates confusion. Coaching provides frameworks that make your message stick.
One of the most effective tools is the SBI Method (Situation–Behavior–Impact):
• Situation – “During yesterday’s team meeting…”
• Behavior – “You interrupted several colleagues…”
• Impact – “That made it harder for others to contribute.”
This approach helps keep feedback objective, focused, and actionable.
4. Creating a Culture Where Feedback Thrives
Coaching isn’t just about individual skill—it’s about shaping how feedback lives across the team.
• Model vulnerability by actively asking for feedback
• Embed feedback into everyday interactions—not just formal reviews
• Celebrate growth and progress—not just results
According to the Center for Creative Leadership, organizations that normalize feedback experience faster innovation, stronger engagement, and more cohesive collaboration.
Practical: Dos and Don’ts of Giving and Receiving Feedback
When You’re Receiving Feedback:
• Do listen fully and curiously—don’t interrupt or assume
• Do ask follow-up questions to clarify and learn
• Do reflect on how it aligns with your values and goals
When You’re Giving Feedback:
• Do focus on behaviors, not personal traits
• Do balance praise with areas for improvement
• Do offer clear, actionable suggestions
Example:
Instead of saying: “You’re not a good communicator.”
Say: “Your ideas are strong, but sometimes unclear. Try summarizing with 2–3 key points to help others follow your message.”
Conclusion: Feedback Isn’t a Threat—It’s a Superpower
It’s time to reclaim feedback from the awkward zone and place it where it belongs: at the center of your leadership.
• Feedback isn’t about criticism—it’s about clarity
• Every awkward moment is a chance to improve
• Curiosity transforms tension into transformation
Ready to lead with confidence?
Book a coaching session today—and turn your next awkward moment into your next breakthrough.
